Should a wife always concede to her husband's preferences on how she lives her life?

Examples of conceding might be to stop dancing, because he doesn't dance, or stop swimming because he doesn't swim; or to go to a wrestling match even though she doesn't care a bit about wrestling.

Clarify Share Report Asked August 13 2015 Mini Anonymous

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Closeup Jennifer Rothnie Supporter Housewife, Artist, Perpetually Curious
The simple answer is 'no', for a woman should not 'always' concede. There are cases where acquiescence is not an option. If a husband asked his wife to prostitute herself out, or come with him to a swinger's club, take drugs, engage in illegal activity, convert to a different religion, etc; none of these would be acceptable.

However, in reality the answer to this is usually far more complicated. A woman should have respect for the wishes, reasoning, and authority of her husband. A husband should be loving toward his wife. Any given issue will require its own time of discussion and prayer, and the answer should not be dependent on the love or respect the other spouse is giving.

Let's take the three examples that were given, for a start:


For the woman in this situation, she would do well to ask her husband why he wishes her to discontinue dancing. There may be many reasons.

-Perhaps he believes coed dancing is a sin. In this case, while there still can be discussion, it would probably be best for the woman to cease dancing. This respects the convictions of her husband, avoids leading her husband into stumbling, and preserves the united front of the couple. This does not mean there can't be gentle, non-nagging discussion about why the woman does not feel it is a sin or why it is important to her.

-Perhaps he is jealous. Jealousy is a legitimate emotion of the man, for the wife is his and he is hers. God too is jealous over his own possessions, us, which is why idolatry is so severe. If the wife is constantly dancing with other men, and he does not dance so cannot be present, then the wife should respect her husbands feelings. Some men do not like the thought of other men touching their wives, even if any flirtation is mild/social. This does not mean compromise cannot be reached; perhaps he will be OK with accompanying her to a dance once in a while, or with getting some basic lessons, or if she takes a couple trusted girl-friends out with her.

- Perhaps the dancing is taking her away from the house too much. If the man has a job, there may not be a lot of free evenings. If the dancing is frequent, he may miss that quality time with his wife. The easiest compromise here would be to lessen the frequency, such as monthly or quarterly vs. Weekly.


Much the same as above - find out his underlying reasons. I would guess that this one is most frequently a matter of time away from the house. He may be missing quality time, or may be worried that the household is not being up-kept, or that the children are missing out time with their mother, etc. Possible compromises here are lessening frequency, or changing the time so that it is when he is at work.


This falls under the broader category of different interests. Generally speaking, it is very healthy to do an activity once in a while that is not a typical 'shared' activity. The best compromise in these cases is to attend once in a while, but not all the time. In the same way, it is a nice gesture to one's husband to sometimes attend an activity with his friends. The overall pattern should be both spouses having separate interests as well as shared interests. Once in a while, there may be some compromise and cross-over. He may invite her to watch wresting, she might invite him to come with her to a cooking show, etc. So long as neither spouse feels pressured to engage in the other's interests all the time, then it can be a bonding experience to share in a separate interest now and then.
[It may help to reflect on how some ways we relate easily to God, and other ways are more difficult, but are still important]


Based on the examples above, I would speculate that in this instance, the husband is feeling that there is a lack of quality time between him and his wife.

Here are some verses that can be useful when discussing and praying over differences like this: 

Eph 5:21-33
Prov 31
I Cor 7:4-5
Rom 14:19
I Cor 13:4-7

August 15 2015 0 responses Vote Up Share Report

Kodak camera 851 John Anderson
No, that would be more like the Muslim religion. 
A very wise Pastor if mine put it this way. God made Eve from the rib. 
Not the foot to be trampled on or the head to be above him. He made her from the side so they could walk side by side in life. Not in front or behind. 
A man always has the last say, and when he is wrong the woman should not say " I told you so". 
He then said when me and my wife were married 56 years ago we decided that she would make all the small decisions and I would make the big ones. 
The most amazing thing about that is that in 56 years I have not had to make one decision. 
He was joking a bit. But, listen to your wife's council or you WILL be sorry when you are wrong.

August 15 2015 0 responses Vote Up Share Report

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