If a gay couple has legally adopted a child, as Christian, how should I respond to them as a family? For example, if both parents are male and if asked by them for assistance, can I provide motherly advice without being perceived as supporting their same sex parenting lifestyle?
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A growing child needs a mother and a father, vey basically. While the gay couples' move to adopt is legal, their intentions for the child are good, and have the financial capabilities, we can not overlook the fact that they cannot provide the most basic of requirements, i.e. a father and a mother. As Christians, our response is one of sadness. Their limitation comes from their own biological incomplementarity. A lesbian cannot be a father, and a gay cannot be a mother. Nonetheless, they are our brothers and/or sisters. We have to support them when they need help in any way we can, even though we do not support their parenting lifestyle. We love them for who they are, i.e. children of God.
In the case of a homosexual couple that has already adopted a child and is looking to you for parental advice, by all means give it! If it makes you feel better to tell the parents that you don't approve of their lifestyle, then by all means. I wouldn't, but that's really up to you. The issue here is not the homosexual couple, but the child! Out of love for the child, you should give any and all parenting advice that you think is pertinent. Why would you withhold important information that could benefit the child because you didn't approve of the lifestyle of the parents? I don't see any wisdom in that decision. And anyway, the homosexual couple are probably not Christians, so in Truth you should disagree with their lifestyle to the same degree that you disagree with the lifestyle of every single person who isn't a Christian. Don't make the mistake of loving another person less because their particular sin is more obvious.
Always always be up front and truthful. But season everything with love! So that way they know where you stand and if they are not bothered by the way you feel about their situation and want to continue to talk to you do not continue to tell them your against their union. There is no need to continue to go there as long as you have said it once. Its hard to give advice to a same sex couple about parenting because a man and a woman bring something unique in their own way to parenting. And when you know and understand how they operate differently there is a way they connect in harmony in raising a child. But with same sex people there is not much advice to give because the are the same sex. Be kind and do what you can!
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