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Questions of faith need to be thoroughly discussed during the dating process. Two Bible-believing Christians can differ on the minors, such as end times interpretations, but should NOT disagree on the major issues, such as the deity of Christ, His plan of salvation (through Christ's sacrifice alone), the virgin birth, the meaning and purpose of communion and baptism, and how the Bible should be interpreted (I.e., literal vs. Allegorical).
Yes, doctrinal agreement is essential in the basic tenets of the faith. How you interpret the Bible is also important - because it undergirds your worldview. Most important is your relationship with God through the Lord Jesus. An issue that faced us as a Free Evangelical married to a Lutheran across international lines (UK + USA; we met on the mission field), was how we viewed baptism - especially the position we would take regarding our children. Another issue was how our respective churches would receive someone from 'outside' their ranks. As it worked out both our children were dedicated to the Lord as infants in the churches were were associated with at the time. My in-laws even travelled to England from America to share in my daughter's 'dry baptism' when she was a month old. Later, having settled in the UK both of our offspring were baptised by immersion as teenagers - and I had the joy and privilege of helping in that wet confirmation of their faith. As far as involvement in church activities is concerned we have been welcomed in whichever setting we find ourselves. My wife is a member of our local evangelical church, and I have preached and spoken in a number of Lutheran churches in USA. Our missionary and international status seems to override local restrictions in these circumstances.
I think what people are failing to realize here is that it isn't about what the church teaches it's about what the bible says. 2 people should decide to concede to what the word of God says concerning something, not concede to something because someone says so. Doing something that is contrary to the word of God isn't advisable in any case. True religion isn't about what the church teaches it's about what the bible says. So 2 Christians of differing denominations should agree to search out the truth of what the bible says and let that decide and lay aside all pre conceived ideas and bias and of course pray for the Holy Spirit to lead. John 16:13 Howbeit when he, the Spirit of truth, is come, he will guide you into all truth: for he shall not speak of himself; but whatsoever he shall hear, that shall he speak: and he will shew you things to come. So when Jesus says the Holy Spirit will lead into all truth I am going to believe what he says. When in doubt go with what the bible says.
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