Why did Jesus say a person must hate his father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters, in order to be his disciple?


Luke 14:26

AMP - 26 If anyone comes to Me and does not hate his [own] father and mother [in the sense of indifference to or relative disregard for them in comparison with his attitude toward God] and [likewise] his wife and children and brothers and sisters--[yes] and even his own life also--he cannot be My disciple.

Clarify Share Report Asked June 30 2013 1358034260 Asabe Tahir

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B8c746f3 63c7 43eb 9665 ef7fba8e191b Kelli Trujillo Supporter Minister, Mother, Grandmother, Teacher, Musician
In the Amplified Version of Luke 14: 26, you can see that there are some explanations about what "hate" means in this context: "In the sense of indifference to or disregard for them in comparison with his attitude toward God." Jesus sometimes spoke in hyperbole, meaning that he exaggerated to make a point, and this is one of those cases. Of course He doesn't want us to "hate" our mother or father, but He doesn't want us to regard ANY person in our lives as more important than Himself. 

It's also helpful to remember that the original language of the New Testament doesn't always translate exactly the same into English, although newer translations and better study tools are helping us to gain a closer understanding to the original text.

July 01 2013 0 responses Vote Up Share Report

Carrying the cross daily Michael Owens
Luke 14:26 just cross reference that with Matthew 10:37 "Anyone who loves their father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves their son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me"
Jesus is teaching His disciples in this chapter and HE does not mean hatred as one would think..After all, 1 John 4:7-8 says "Beloved, let us love one another for love is from God and everyone that loves is born of God and knows God.
Jesus may have chosen the word "hate" to show us that this is how a mother or father will perceive the actions of a child who chooses the Lord above them. They will see it as disloyal, especially if we try to witness to them. The love of a Christian for a non-Christian is almost always seen as hatred, intolerance, bigotry, etc. But we must be okay with being seen as "hating." After all, our unbelieving relatives are part of the world, and Jesus said, “"If the world hates you, keep in mind that it hated me first” John 15:18

July 01 2013 0 responses Vote Up Share Report

Mini Anonymous
the Greek word used in Luke 14:26 properly used as "miseo" means, 3404 miséō – properly, to detest (on a comparative basis); hence, denounce; to love someone or something less than someone (something) else, i.e. to renounce one choice in favor of another.

Lk 14:26: "If anyone comes to Me, and does not hate (3404 /miséō, 'love less' than the Lord) his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be My disciple" (NASU).

[Note the comparative meaning of 3404 (miséō) which centers in moral choice, elevating one value over another.]

July 12 2013 3 responses Vote Up Share Report

Mini Johnnatta Giles Spirit Filled Christian
This means anyone that one must love Jesus even more than his immediate family and even more than himself.

July 01 2013 0 responses Vote Up Share Report

1358034260 Asabe Tahir
Thank you, for all your answers. 
Indeed! God should take FIRST place IN our lives, ABOVE: mother, father, husband, wife, children, brothers & sisters; and SELF (He must increase, but I must decrease." John 3:30 ESV). 

To be a TRUE disciple of Christ, it MUST be ALL about God's WILL. At one point  when Jesus' mother and brothers came to seek Him out....
"Now Jesus’ mother and brothers came to see him, but they were not able to get near him because of the crowd. Someone told him, “Your mother and brothers are standing outside, wanting to see you.” He replied, “My mother and brothers are those who HEAR God’s WORD and PUT IT INTO PRACTICE.” (Luke 8:19-21 NIV)

In another instance with His disciples, when they were concerned about His welfare, He declared...
Meanwhile his disciples urged him, “Rabbi, eat something.” But he said to them, “I have food to eat that you know nothing about.” Then his disciples said to each other, “Could someone have brought him food?” “My food,” said Jesus, “IS TO DO THE WILL OF HIM who sent me and TO FINISH HIS WORK. (John 4:31-34 NIV)

Then Jesus said to his disciples, “Whoever wants to be my disciple MUST DENY THEMSELVES and TAKE UP THEIR CROSS and FOLLOW ME. For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will find it. What good will it be for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul? Or what can anyone give in exchange for their soul? (Matthew 16:24-26 NIV)

And he died for all, THAT THOSE WHO LIVE SHOULD NO LONGER LIVE FOR THEMSELVES BUT FOR HIM who died for them and was raised again. (2 Corinthians 5:15 NIV)

I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. (Galatians 2:20 NIV)

July 01 2013 3 responses Vote Up Share Report

1340324413 Chris Eleam Chris Eleam
Hate just means love less not a malicious hate

July 01 2013 0 responses Vote Up Share Report

Mini Pam Johnson
I believe Jesus was telling us to make a choice......choose whom you will follow this day. If we give all to follow Jesus and choose to obey Him to the best of our ability, then we will be in right relationship with Him. Sometimes this choice conflicts with the world and especially within our families. This happens more often outside of the US now as we see Muslims converting to Christianity and being hurt because of it. If we place our relationship with family members OVER our relationship with God and choose to disobey something God tells us to do b/c it would upset our relationship within the family.....that is sin and putting humans will before God's will. Obviously within a Christian family (when all are Christian and following God) we have a deep love for our family members. Even if they aren't Christian we can still love our family members very, very much and still choose to follow God and put Him first in our lives.

July 01 2013 2 responses Vote Up Share Report

Mini Emijah Parker
Simple he want us to forsake everything. Even our mother's and farther's cause even with their good intentions they will fail us in our walk with him. So he wants us to leave everything to follow him like the apostle's did.

July 01 2013 1 response Vote Up Share Report

Mini Rev james Olanipekun
Hatered is a strong word. Why would Jesus that teaches love as the greatest command preach hate? Looking at this word ordinarily will be amounting to shortsightedness . Many people love their families than The Lord and in doing so forgets The Lord of all. In the the first place Jesus came to lay down His life for His friends. Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friends. (John 15:13 NKJV).
Considering this scripture who is then should be most loved than Jesus? I know Jesus loved His  mum even at the point of death made provision for her, but didn't allow his love for her  to impede His ministry .

July 01 2013 0 responses Vote Up Share Report

Mini Anonymous
There is this ministry called Bethelministries.com that I just came across by accident. I would love others to go to the website and just read articles by this minister. Very intense. He said in one of his article quoteing this verse, that only men can become disciples. You notice wifes are not told to hate husband. Also He said that in luke it its very clear what the requirments are to be a disciple which he said 99.9 percent of christians have not done. He does not say women can't be saved but Jesus never called a women to be a disciple while here on earth. I would love to know what others think?

July 01 2013 5 responses Vote Up Share Report

Data Danny Hickman Supporter Believer in The Gospel Of Jesus Christ
I think the "teaching" (not rule) to hate the people whom it's only natural to love, is given to establish a poignant "bottom line." Clearly, statements like the one in question are made by Jesus to make the hearer pay special attention to what's being said. The "bottom line" is that there are communities where if a family member turns from following the tradition of the community and commits their life to following Christ, the community, even close family members, will ostracize the person. Some even threaten violence toward those who become believers in the gospel of Jesus Christ. The teaching is that under such circumstances it is acceptable to God for the new believer to abandon the family, to not "honor thy mother and father." (Ex 20:12)

It's stated as if it's a requirement for a believer to hate his/her loved ones to become a disciple of Jesus Christ. We know nothing about God if we let anything like that creep into our minds about Him. However, it IS a requirement to "hate" mother and father if your father and mother are steeped in one of the traditions that proclaim hatred for believers in Christ. If that's the only way to deliverance, then that's the only way. Life can be hard. (Therefore many of His disciples, when they heard this, said, "This is a hard saying, who can understand it?" This was when Jesus said His disciples must drink His blood and eat His flesh, Jn 6:60). He didn't mean that to be understood literally, but it was still hard to decipher. He meant something! The same dynamic is in play here in Luke 14:26. He wants to be sure and get His point across to us. I think He means that there is no "family and friends day" in the kingdom of God the way there is in many churches. 

For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world and loses his soul? Or what will a man give in exchange for his soul? (Mt 16:26) Our parents and loved ones are temporary, our souls are eternal. If our souls aren't eternal and our most prized possession, then Mt 16:26 doesn't make any sense. Jesus just said that NOTHING (the whole world is included in that nothing) is as valuable to us as our soul. We need to wrap our minds around that truth, and not allow ourselves to be "tossed to and fro by the waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine, by human cunning, by craftiness in deceitful schemes" (Eph 4:14). You can be sure, the enemy doesn't want us to know this. So he says 'did God say you must hate the people you're supposed to love,' that sort of thing. God's word is questioned as to its value and reliability. Those who hear the words of Jesus and does them can be compared to a wise man (Mt 7:24). 
That includes "hating" those you need to "hate" to become a follower of Christ. 

I don't believe many of us believe God is trying to teach us to hate anyone. But just for the sake of debate, let's pretend for a moment we are being told we will either turn our backs on our "family and friends" or spend eternity in hell. Is the choice really that hard to decide about? If so, refer again to Mt 16:26. 
Believe in the Lord Jesus and you will be saved, you and your household (Acts 16:31). That's the only requirement. 

This scripture is another one that starts a debate. Does it mean that if I believe and am saved, that my wife Faye and three daughters, and all of my grands are saved also by my belief in Jesus? What about my nieces and nephews, aunts, uncles and cousins? Of course not! That's not the intended meaning. It's shorthand speech for saying, 'the same is true for your household when they believe in Jesus.' Paul and Silas were telling a Roman jailer what he must do to be saved. And they wanted him to know that the same was true for ALL Gentiles. Salvation had been made available to all of mankind. That was what they meant. 

Jesus doesn't need us to show how much we love Him by showing our hatred for others. But if you think He does and it's a problem for you, refer again to Mt 16:26.

August 11 2019 0 responses Vote Up Share Report

My picture Jack Gutknecht ABC/DTS graduate, guitar music ministry Baptist church
First, see the big picture:

3 Proofs of Discipleship
Leaving kindred Luke 14:26
Hating his own life Luke 14:26
Bearing the cross Luke 14:27

When our nearest and dearest relationships prove to be positive obstacles in coming to Christ, then all natural affections must be flung aside; comp. Deuteronomy 13:6-9; Deu 21:19-21; Deu 33:8-9. A reference to Matthew 10:37 will shew that ‘hate’ means hate by comparison. Our Lord purposely stated great principles in their boldest and even most paradoxical form by which He alone has succeeded in impressing them forever as principles on the hearts of His disciples.

As Kelli mentioned above, in one of the Amplified Bibles, Amplified Bible, Classic Edition (AMPC), it has, "Luke 14:26 If anyone comes to Me and does not hate his [own] father and mother [[a]in the sense of indifference to or relative disregard for them in comparison, with his attitude toward God] and [likewise] his wife and children and brothers and sisters—[yes] and even his own life also—he cannot be My disciple."

Luke 14:26 G. Abbott-Smith, Manual Greek Lexicon.

“If you want to be my disciple, you must, by comparison, hate everyone else—your father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters—yes, even your own life. Otherwise, you cannot be my disciple.

In Luke 14:26 Jesus most seemingly was using a vivid hyperbole (an exaggeration or extravagant statement used as a figure of speech). In the Hebrew mind, "hate" means "love less. (Gen. 29:31-33; Deut. 21:15). To hate doesn't mean positive antagonism but instead "to love less" (Gen. 29:30-31; Mal. 1:2-3; Mt 10:37). Our love for God must be so strong that all other love is like hatred in comparison.

If any man comes to me,... Not in a corporeal, but in a spiritual way; nor barely to hear him preach, but so come, as that he believes in him, applies to him for grace, pardon, righteousness, life, and salvation; professes to be his, submits to his ordinances, and desires to be a disciple of his; (Gill's Exposition of the Bible)

I.e. unless you love less your nearest and dearest loved ones than you love Christ, you cannot be His disciple.

"Hate" doesn't justify malice or ill will toward one's family, but it means that devotion to the family must take 2nd place to one's devotion to Christ.

May 17 2020 0 responses Vote Up Share Report

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