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I prayfully reply to this out of my experience. My husband and I hit a roadblock 5 years after marriage. I fell out of love and didn’t care if he would’ve found someone else. I didn’t enjoy being with him anymore and our intimate life was out of the picture. However, being a Christian I knew this was not how God wanted it. I decided to do something I never thought about - pray and ask God to help me love this man again. James 5:16 states: “Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.” I prayed with all my heart for the sake of my children and our own happiness for God to heal my marriage. God started showing me the things my husband did for our home, how he was providing for our family, the good he was doing for our children. I started to see him with different eyes and with time, I began feeling love for him once again. We recently celebrated our 18th anniversary and we are happily married. Our children are happy and our home has harmony. We can’t stop praying, it is a continuous effort and God has continued answering us. Only God can heal - and we must never ever give up hope.
1 Corinthians 13:4, "Love suffers long and is kind,...is not provoked...endures all things." Ephesians 5:25, "Husbands, love your just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her..." When the wife understands the love her husband feels for she will turn to him. 1 Corinthians 7:3, "Let the husband render to his wife the affection due we, and likewise the wife to her husband." And most importantly...seek God's council in your situation. Always do that which is love!
Marriage is unique in the way that we are to look inward and review ourselves first before attempting to understand the brides love. For example, God says to love your spouse as Jesus lives, lived and loves, loved the church, the bride, (those of us who are believers). Ephesians 5:25-33 (ref the entire chapter). The direction is to each spouse to use Jesus as the focus and example. Jesus did not put a qualifier about the bride loving Him, or he would not have gone to the cross and died for the bride, which He will return for, the bride. In fact the idea He will return shows the bride needs to come into fullness. The bride needs the Holy Spirit to understand and love the groom. Both spouses connected are the bride and individually as Christian believers. In a relationship, we need to self examine if I am loving first, and am I lovable and true as a Christ follower? It is our actions over time, that will win our spouses over. Are they to are connected with the Holy Spirit? If not it is the believing spouse's desire to wash the other with the word into belief. Trusting the Holy Spirit to work in the heart. This is key for both spouses to come into Christlike love and be lovable. We must be connected to God as Jesus said, apart from me you can do nothing. John15:4 God directs us to Love others as we love ourself. We must care for ourselves and our body as well to be lovable.
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