Can a Messianic Jew marry a Christian?


Clarify Share Report Asked May 04 2014 Mini Anonymous

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Stringio Vincent Mercado Supporter Skeptic turned believer, Catholic, father of 3
Yes, a Messianic Jew can marry a Christian.

In marriages with disparity of cult, the Christian spouse has a particular task: "For the unbelieving husband is consecrated through his wife, and the unbelieving wife is consecrated through her husband." (1 Cor 7:14) It is a great joy for the Christian spouse and for the Church if this "consecration" should lead to the free conversion of the other spouse to the Christian faith. Sincere married love, the humble and patient practice of the family virtues, and perseverance in prayer can prepare the non-believing spouse to accept the grace of conversion.

May 06 2014 2 responses Vote Up Share Report

Closeup Jennifer Rothnie Supporter Housewife, Artist, Perpetually Curious
Assuming this is referring to a messianic jew (ethnically or culturally jewish christian) marrying a gentile christian:

Yes! Christians can marry christians of other backgrounds or differing denominations, so long as both believe that Jesus is savior and Lord.

Ruth is an example of a gentile marrying a jew - but she served the God of the jews. Despite their cultural differences and vastly differing backgrounds, the story of Boaz and Ruth is an endearing tale of perseverance and submission to God. They chose each other for their devotion to God and their character - not because they had similar pasts.

There can be difficulties marrying someone with a vastly different background (or even with the same background), so some things should be evaluated before marriage: 

- Does the other person demand you move to their way? (Such as, you must become a member of their denomination or believe exactly as they do?) While some compromise is understandable for unity, and is a healthy show of sacrificial love - one should not feel forced to change core beliefs. This can lead to unhappiness and isolation, or even unwitting involvement in cults.

- Does the difference interfere with the couple's unity (such as endless arguments over Calvanism or eschatology)? This is a red flag for communication and resolution in the future.

- How will the children be raised? (more jewish culture, more secular, a mix, let them pick, etc). It is best for the parents to present a united front in their rearing of children.

- How will holidays be handled? Church attendance? Unforeseen conflicts? Etc. (The more the two can set out some guidelines pre-marriage, the better).

- Is the woman ready and willing to submit (willing to let her husband take the lead and responsibility if a hard choice needs to be made)? 

- Is the man willing and ready to love (taking into account the background and preferences of his wife, not bullying her or forcing her to compromise beyond what she is comfortable with, etc).

And so forth. These can be issues even with couples that have closer practices than jewish christian/gentile christian.

[I'll end with a few cases to think over. These aren't from scripture, but made up situations one can evaluate with the above questions in mind to decide how recommended/healthy they are]

#1 After meeting each other at several community volunteer events, Bob is drawn to Sally's character. He is tempted to ask her out. He's a messianic jew, she's a fairly conservative christian. He decides to bring the issue up with her before they date or court about their differing cultural backgrounds. She is excited about how his jewish background brings out so much meaning in Christ's sacrifice, and is amenable to courting. They make sure to discuss how the children will be raised early on - so they don't rush into affection before they have a good idea of their different philosophies and what is important to each of them. 

#2 Eric and Lydia felt like it was love at first sight. Being raised baptist, Lydia was attracted to Eric's charismatic openness to the spirit. Everyone told them they would be a great couple so they started dating. A few months down the road, Lydia is beginning to realize that Eric doesn't have a very strong grounding in scripture, and is finding she is leading/pulling Eric. Eric is beginning to realize that Lydia has some strong opinions that she won't compromise or listen about, and feels she doesn't trust him to be a good father. 

#3 Rita and Ben have attended the same church since childhood. They parted for the college years before reuniting in their hometown and suddenly realizing they liked each other. They've been dating for a while, but Ben has hesitated to propose. He's realized just how complacent he is being in his walk with God, and wants to serve in some ministry to the lost and hurting. Rita likes to stick to ministries within the church and finds his enthusiasm for the intercity 'wierd'.

July 22 2014 0 responses Vote Up Share Report

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