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Perhaps it will help to consider one of the most profound statements in the Bible: "God is love" (1 John 4:8). Never was a more important declaration made than this-God is love. This is a profound ...
I can really relate to your question. The very first time I read the Bible front to back, I felt very much the same way. (ever heard the old saying a little knowledge is a dangerous thing?) But, as I continued to read it, and read it, and read it, I discovered something. Many parts of the Bible are not understood until you get enough of the Bible in you. By the time I had read the Bible front to back probably 5 times, I came to know God quite differently. I realized He was not the wrathful overseer I had imagined, rather I came to realize just how "just" God is. Is was only then that I could allow myself to ask Him to show me how to Love Him the way I wanted to and then receive that ability to Love Him. So to answer your question, read your Bible front to back close enough together that it will sink deep inside you. You will understand many things you never did before. Then just pray and ask Him to teach you to Love Him. And I am not saying that you don't love him already and that you don't read your Bible already. But I believe if you will read it front to back several times in succession (I understand this will take some time), then you will be ready to ask him how to Love Him. I need to say that not everyone needs to do this. Some people receive the ability to Love and accept God when they are saved. But maybe you are like me. I believe I have a gift of teacher (though others gifts' like Michael's, far surpass my own), and as a teacher, I need to understand things differently than just to accept it because I was told to. Or maybe it was just my upbringing. Maybe I just wanted to Love God more than I was capable of. Regardless, the above formula worked for me and I believe it will work for you too.
The fear of God as being wrathful, is expressed by many folks. Yes the Old Testament where the Lord does destroy Israel's enemy's. However spiritually His reasoning is perfect. Evil and Good cannot exist together. It's like trying to mix oil and water. His love for His people is clearly evident. When Jesus came and died on the cross, Our Fathers anger was resolved. The New Testament or new way to approach our Father was made available along with The Holy Spirit to helps us. God is a loving, doting Father. He absolutely delights in His children. God hears His children when they call.
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