Ezekiel Kimosop Supporter

Despite his handsome or comely looks reported in 2 Samuel 14:25, Absalom was decidedly a spoilt boy, a royal rebel per excellence whose moral reigns were broken. His outrage is understandable but his secret murder plot was unacceptable. He should have allowed the royal judicial system to take its course against Amnon. 

Surprisingly, his father David forgave him for the murder of his half brother Amnon. This was perhaps because of the provocation brought about by the incestuous rape. It is also possible that his influential uncles petitioned David to spare the life of the young prince following his escape to Geshur. Interestingly, Joab was behind the royal intrigues leading to David's forgiveness of Absalom! 

Absalom was not done with his royal mischief. He went on to plot other schemes in open defiance. He did not appear to have learned any lessons from his previous deviant acts.

In the second incident recorded in Scripture, Absalom instructed his servants to set on fire Joab's ripe and uncut barley crop in an act of revenge after Joab refused to take him to see his father David (2 Samuel 14:28-30). At this point, Absalom had been in isolation for the murder of Amnon. This restriction was in furtherance of a royal decree. It was two years since Absalom returned from Geshur and his impatience got the better of him. 

David had graciously offered a royal pardon to Absalom following his murder of Amnon but there was a caveat: David proclaimed that Absalom should not be allowed to appear before the king for a given period of time. This effectively implied that Absalom's royal status was downgraded. He was a persona non grata within the royal courts for the duration contemplated by the royal decree. Absalom finally got a chance to see his father and the two embraced and reconciled (2 Samuel 14:25-33). David loved the young prince despite his despicable conduct. 

2 Samuel 14 reveals that Absalom plotted a third act of mischief. He set himself up as a royal gatekeeper, a "deep-state" kind of personality, in order to endear himself to the people of Israel and subvert the royal authority of his father. 

Scripture says that Absalom stole the hearts of the men of Israel (2 Samuel 15:6). He became popular in the royal corridors and his father was deeply worried on learning of this development but he did nothing to restrain him. 

It appears that following David's dereliction in reigning in on the ambitious prince, tragedy after tragedy followed.

Finally, Absalom in his growing fame, attempted a jackpot heist. He plotted a palace coup and succeeded in mounting a surprise rebellion against his father David. The young prince had come of age. He daringly sought to unseat his father! Absalom had initially lied to his father David that he was heading to Hebron to pay a vow before God. When David caught wind of Absalom's plot, fear gripped him and he quickly left Jerusalem. 

Absalom temporarily deposed his father before his rebellion was finally crushed by the royal army. Absalom fled David's army and died under tragic circumstances while under hot pursuit by Joab, David's commander. Joab, [an evil man] killed Absalom despite the royal orders from David that they should not harm the rebel prince (2 Samuel 18). Did Joab perhaps use the opportunity to execute his revenge for Absalom's burning of his uncut crop? 

Absalom's life came to a tragic end in what would pass for an epic movie script. 

CONCLUSION

David loved Absalom exceedingly and this could have contributed to the delinquency identified with the young man and his unfortunate demise. He had perhaps failed to exercise his parental and royal authority in chastising his sons. 

We learn from 1 Kings 1:6 that David was equally soft on Adonijah, one of his sons by Haggith, who later rebelled against him in the royal succession matrix. Adonijah also unsuccessfully attempted to mount a palace coup with the support of a few close confidants of David including Joab and Abiathiar.

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Jeffrey Johnson Supporter

Why did David allow Absalom to return to Jerusalem but refuse to see him for two years?

David allowed Absalom to return to Jerusalem (2 Samuel 14) because of his lingering affection and Joab's urging. Still, he refused to see him for two years to avoid condoning the murder of Amnon. This "half-forgiveness" served as a punishment to maintain justice, keep a dangerous, popular, and rebellious son at a distance, and manage the political fallout of his actions.

Details on the Decision:

A Balance of Justice and Mercy: David was torn between his duty as king to punish murder and his love as a father, resulting in a compromised, incomplete reconciliation.

Symbolic Rejection: By not allowing Absalom to see his face, David withheld the favour and royal status usually afforded to his sons, effectively keeping him under house arrest.

Political Consequences: This strained, intermediate state created bitterness in Absalom, ultimately leading to his coup d'état against David.

Lingering Guilt: Some interpretations suggest David's own guilt over his sin with Bathsheba and the murder of Uriah made him lenient toward his children's sins, yet the political necessity of the situation forced this partial punishment.

The biblical account in 2 Samuel 14 details several reasons for these two years of estrangement:

Judicial Justice: As king and chief judge, David was responsible for upholding the Mosaic Law, which demanded the death penalty for premeditated murder. By refusing to see Absalom, David maintained a "judicial distance," signalling that the bloodguilt for the murder of his half-brother Amnon remained unresolved.

Testing for Repentance: Commentaries suggest David withheld his presence to allow time for Absalom to reflect on his crime and show genuine repentance. In ancient Near Eastern culture, "seeing the king's face" was a sign of full favour and reconciliation; denying it meant the relationship was not yet restored.

Public Perception: David likely wanted to show the people of Israel his abhorrence for the crime. Immediately pardoning his son could have been seen as royal favouritism and a violation of the Law, potentially undermining his credibility as a just ruler.

A "Half-Measure" of Mercy: David's decision is often described as an unwise compromise. He granted "geographic restoration" by allowing Absalom to return to Jerusalem, but denied "relational restoration," a delay that ultimately fueled the bitterness that led to Absalom's later rebellion. 

Why did David not want Absalom to see his face?

He hoped that Absalom's reconciliation with David would prevent a rebellion. "Let him return to his own house, but do not let him see my face": David was overindulgent with his sons in the past (such as when he got angry but did nothing against Amnon in 2 Samuel 13:21).

2 Samuel 14:24: "And the king said, Let him turn to his own house, but let him not see my face. So Absalom turned to his own house, and saw not the king's face."

Restoration to Favour. 

When three years had eased the pain of the loss of his firstborn, David felt paternal longing for Absalom. Joab, by means of stratagem, reading his royal uncle's thoughts, opened the way for David to extend a probationary pardon, allowing Absalom to be repatriated but without the right to appear in his father's court. (2Sa 13:39; 14:1-24) Absalom endured this ostracised status for two years and then began manoeuvring for a full pardon. When Joab, as an official of the king's court, refused to visit him, Absalom peremptorily had Joab's barley field burned and, when the indignant Joab came, told him he wanted a final decision by the king and said, "If there is any error in me, he must then put me to death." When Joab relayed the message, David received his son, who thereupon fell on the ground in a symbol of complete submission, and the king gave him the kiss of full pardon.​—2Sa 14:28-33.

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Jack Gutknecht Supporter Arizona Bible College graduate and Dallas Seminary graduate

It's anybody's guess, but I can offer possibilities. Maybe David wanted to wait and see if Absalom was becoming repentant for having murdered Amnon. Then this would be a probation time. It was already a concession to allow him this close. David not only was a father, but he had to look out for the nation, as king. 

Another possibility was that David knew the nation would be watching. He was the ultimate judge in judicial affairs. What Absalom had done was attrocious. He couldn't be just welcomed back with open arms, feasting, and celebrating. That would make David look like an indulgent father, i.e. bad. 

A third possibility is what I'll call "the ghost of Uriah." He, David, had Uriah killed so he was guilty of murder. How could he come down hard on his own son, Absalom, for doing the same thing. David may have felt guilty. If he didn't keep Absalom "at arm's length," he would feel hypocritical. I as a pastor for 7 years think I saw this in one of my church families. 

Lastly, since Joab had initiated the wise woman of Tekoa talking to David about an imaginary scenario that would persuade David to let Absalom come back to Jerusalem, maybe David saw that he was tricked by Joab, and decided to crack down on his tactic, and reassert his kingly power by keeping Absalom away, still, though not far away.

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