Is it a sin for my daughter who has had children with her partner to leave him because she feels unhappy and has no love for him?
She recently confessed to having fantasies of reuniting with her first boyfriend. Now, she believes this might be a sign from God. I explained to her that according to the Bible, God does not tempt. My daughter and father of my grandchildren are born again Christians but still never married. He did make many mistakes, but he repented. My daughter has her issues, too, but now, she wants to let him go. It breaks my heart because of the children. And I don't want her to make a serious mistake.
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Asked August 03 2024
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Gloria Mendoza
Supporter
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Tim Maas
Supporter
Despite the absence of a formal marriage relationship, the main consideration at this point is the welfare of their children. To me, there is no way that leaving a relationship with the children's father (especially if he is purportedly a born-again Christian) could be something that would be conducive to the welfare of those children, or something that God would call on her to do, through fantasies or otherwise. The daughter and her partner should pledge their commitment to each other through formal marriage, and then pursue Christian counselling efforts (individual, joint, or both) to heal the brokenness in both their lives, as well as in their relationship. The role of the daughter's mother should be to do everything possible to encourage and contribute to the success of both the daughter and her husband in that effort, as well as to be a stabilizing influence to her grandchildren.
Donna Williams
Supporter
Sis. Gloria: the sin is that they're living together and are not married. It reminds me of the woman at the well in John 4:16-18, when Jesus said to her, "Go, call your husband, and come here." The woman answered and said, "I have no husband." Jesus said to her, "You have well said, 'I have no husband,' "for you have had five husbands, and the one whom you now have is not your husband; in that you spoke truly." It is an unfortunate situation that they have had children together, but never really committed themselves to one another by entering into a marriage covenant. I believe that these kinds of relationships always leave room for one or the other to make the decision to walk away. We all would love for them to stay together for the sake of the children, but is it in the best interest of all? If your daughter is having fantasies about her old boyfriend she is being drawn away by her lust, and her heart is not with the one she is with now! Also, if she's unhappy and doesn't love him, why stay together? I believe they need to sit down and have an honest conversation, and seek counseling on how to move forward, and for the sake of their children. Jesus commended the Samaritan woman for telling the truth. This is real life and things don't always work out the way we want them to! God is never going to go against our will. Yes, He desires that we do what's right, and wants us to make decisions according to His will, but we don't always do things God's way! My advice is, continue to pray and leave the rest to God to do what is best for all. May you find rest in the promises of God!
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