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I would say that believers should confess and repent of the actions that they realize have grieved the Holy Spirit, and seek God's forgiveness of those actions for Jesus' sake. They should then strive, with the Holy Spirit's help, to engage in the types of behaviors mentioned by Paul in that same chapter (Ephesians 4:17-32), including: -- speaking truthfully to others; -- not clinging to anger, bearing malice, or nursing grudges; -- engaging in honest work for income to obtain desired possessions, rather than stealing, and also so that they can give some of that income to others in need; -- speaking only words that will benefit others or address their needs, rather than seeking to slander them or tear them down; and -- displaying the same kind of kindness and compassion toward others that God had displayed toward them in making it possible for them to be saved through faith in Christ.
The fact that a believer becomes conscious of grieving The Holy Spirit is the outcome of the work of the Holy Spirit. In John 16:8, one of the work of The Holy Spirit is "to convict of sin, and of righteousness, and of judgment." When a believer becomes aware of a behavior that is causing grief to the Holy Spirit, the believer needs to humble himself and yield to the will of The Holy Spirit. The believer needs to confess his sin with a repentant mind and believes the promise of God to forgive him and cleanse him from all unrighteousness (1John 1: 7- 9). Lastly the believer needs to return to the communion of the Holy Spirit by walking in the light or to put on your new nature. Eph. 4: 23-24.
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