What shall I do when a parent is dying in the last few days of life? Do I continue with my life or wait around for them to die? My brother says I should put my holiday plans on hold until my mother dies. My mother told me when she was conscious to go enjoy myself and have a good time. What would Jesus do?
ESV - 12 Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long in the land that the Lord your God is giving you.
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Personally I can relate on a very personal level to your painful feelings. Being torn by wanting to do what is right by your parents and having your own life and future are very hard choices. From what I am gathering from your question, your mother is no longer able to voice her opinion about what she would like to see happen to herself or to her children. You asked what would Jesus do in a similar situation. I believe that He took care of His mother the very best He could as the eldest son. He gave His mother to His most trusted disciple, John to care for, despite the fact He had brothers that could have easily taken care of her. Jesus knew John was the best choice for the task. He entrusted His beloved mother into his care. John 19:26-27 We really don't know what happened to Jesus' earthly father, Joseph. We don't know when he died, leaving Mary a widow. However, we do know that Jesus always took great pity on widows, even raising their dead when possible. Did He raise Joseph, even for a while? This is unknown. What we do know, is that after Jesus was twelve, and before He was thirty, Joseph died. This being said, you must ask yourself this question: How did your mother live her life? Was she clinging to her children? Did she encourage you to spread your wings and fly, see where life took you? You must decide for yourself if her last words to you were her last act of unselfish love, or truly her life-long nature. My father was very ill with cancer but seemed stable. It was Christmas time and my husband and I had not been to see his family in about two years. They only lived 100 miles from us, but caring for a restaurant and my parents had kept us away. We decided to sneak away for a day. No sooner than we arrived, we received a call from the hospital to come quickly! As I entered the hospital room, my family had been waiting, wondering where we had been. My father looked up in serious pain and said, "I waited on you!" I asked him if anyone else was on the room.. he was shocked! "You see them too, Sissy?" Not knowing what else to say, I said, "Sure, Dad" he sighed.. "They've been here almost all day, they are so bright!" Understanding flooded my heart... I leaned over and kissed his head. I promised him we'd take care of mom.. then I told him.. "Dad, Jesus is behind those bright lights!" It was the last breath he took. When they called the funeral home, the man said, " He looks like he just won the lottery! What did y'all do to him?" Now, I know where my father is. This was an awesome experience. I almost missed it being 100 miles away. You didn't say how far you wanted to travel... Would you want to miss your mother's homegoing? Be blessed, Ms. Lena
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