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My non-believer girlfriend had a miscarriage. Should I still marry her?

My non-believer girlfriend was pregnant and I was determined to marry her.  My Christian friends and family around me supported this decision, seeing it as the Biblical decision for us and for the baby. I repented in front of God and started preparing myself for marriage and committed my heart to her, confirmed my intention to marry her on all aspects. Around 8 weeks into the pregnancy, my girl friend had a miscarriage. 

Should I still marry her?  Does this miscarriage mean that our marriage is not blessed by God?  My Christian parents see this as the opportunity God gave me to leave this relationship, to not be unequally yoked with the unbeliever. 

I know that at this fragile moment, taking back all my promises to marry her means an end to this relationship.  But my conscience doesn't allow me to walk away at this time while we're both healing from the lost of the baby.  I still love her.  And I know leaving right now means more hurt for the both of us.  Though I don't doubt the healing power of God, is this the right thing to do?  Am I sinning more by breaking my promises so that I won't be condemned of bearing unequal yoke?

Clarify Share Report Asked May 23 2017 Mini Anonymous

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Eced7a1f c81d 42f4 95ea 9d5719dce241 Singapore Moses Messenger of God, CEO in IT industry, Astronaut, Scientist
Not that every man or woman is required to be married, but those who choose to be are permitted by Christianity to get married. The gospel does not interpose any hindrance to marriage and normal creative relationship. (1Cor 7:2). Your experience of having pre-marital sex is adultery. This is similar to tge experience of David in - 2 Samuel 11:1-12:14


Though David comes to the throne of Israel only after a long period of trials designed by God to sanctify him, he is by no means a perfected man. Indeed, his greatest stumble comes some years after his coronation. Walking on the roof of his palace one evening, he spots a woman bathing and apparently goes temporarily insane over her. His inquiries reveal that she is Bathsheba, the wife of Uriah the Hittite, one of his “mighty men” (2 Sam. 23:39), but even her marital status does not dash the plan he is forming in his heart. He has her brought to the palace and has sexual relations with her. But in God’s providence, Bathsheba becomes pregnant, and David soon falls even deeper into sin in an effort to conceal his iniquity. Summoning Uriah to Jerusalem, David urges him to go home and spend the night with his wife, hoping that he might have relations with her and believe that David’s baby is his own. But the faithful soldier refuses to go and sleeps at the palace door. David then gets Uriah drunk, but again he does not go home. Finally David concocts a plan by which Uriah is killed in battle, and David proceeds to marry Bathsheba. He has now committed adultery and proxy murder with no apparent remorse. He gives every appearance of a man whose conscience is seared.

But God will not let his son remain in sin. He sends Nathan the prophet to tell David a parable about a rich man who steals a poor man’s beloved ewe lamb. Apparently assuming the story is real, David expresses outrage, saying the rich man ought to make restitution and should die. Then Nathan delivers the blow that wakes David from his spiritual lethargy: “ ‘You are the man.’ ” He then reminds David of all God’s goodness to him and asks why he has “ ‘despised the commandment of the Lord.’ ” By God’s grace, David is enabled to see the truth: “ ‘I have sinned against the Lord,’ ” he admits. He then goes on to make one of the most heartfelt repentances in Scripture, expressing his sorrow and desperate longing for restoration to God in Psalm 51.

David was a great sinner, a human being such as all of us are, capable of being enticed by the lusts of his flesh. But he was truly a man after God’s heart. Deep down, far below his sinful desires, he longed to do God’s will and was grieved when confronted with his failure. He sinned greatly and repented greatly. 

Same way, if you still love her, please go ahead to marry her. And win her soul fir Christ too. I believe once you both repent and come clean, then marry her, she will bear a child for you. All the best for your marriage plans. 

God bless you!

June 19 2017 0 responses Vote Up Share Report


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