What advice should we give to an unwed Christian who has gotten pregnant?


Clarify Share Report Asked August 17 2016 Mini Anonymous

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Mini Terry Galloway Christ follower, Bible lover, mission of sharing the gospel
First, I would encourage her and give her support to healthily carry the baby to delivery and seek godly counsel and prayer for whether or not she should give the baby up for adoption or to marry the baby's father (if he is offering). I don't believe marriage is always God's will in this situation.

I would remind her that God creates life, He has chosen to create this child from fornication and clearly states in His word that He forms us in the womb. I would let her know that you are committed to praying for the health and future of this child, and if she is contemplating abortion, I would have her watch the 180movie.com on youtube put out by Way of the Master.

Secondly, you have to consider her spiritual life. You state that she is a Christian. Are you comfortable asking her the basic evangelistic questions to determine whether she is a false conversion (possibly growing up in a Christian home) who has not been born again? Does she have the indwelling Holy Spirit that was convicting her of her sin, but she was grieving the Spirit? Is she a sheep that knows His voice and has the Holy Spirit guiding her into all truth, but perhaps a baby in the faith? Most born again Christians would not be involved in sex outside of marriage, but maybe this was a one night stand of temptation?

1 John gives us the tests for our faith as to whether we are Christian in name only or genuinely a Christian. In America, particularly young people, so so many believe they are Christians (I was one, going to church, singing in the choir, got baptized at age 12 and having sex with my boyfriend- with even a pregnancy scare- but had never come to brokenness, repentance and genuine faith to be born again and stop sinning) when actually they are false conversions. Read up on Got Questions.org and Way of the Master about false conversions. It is a huge problem in the USA, and if not addressed, sadly so many will hear Jesus say Matthew 7:21-23. No one should tell a person that they are a Christian since the Bible says that we are to work out our salvation with fear and trembling and that we are to examine ourselves to see if we really are in the faith. (Philippians 2:12, 2 Corinthians 13:5)

Fortunately, what seems like a horrible situation, God can actually use for good. I finally was in a horrible situation at age 44 and surrendered my entire life to Christ at age 45 and was brought to repentance and faith and got re-baptized. Then Jesus walked me through the situation and continues to walk with me to this day. I am so grateful to Him. We don't know His ways to bring someone into salvation.

We should give love and grace to this girl, but it is not loving to just let her think that she is a Christian if she doesn't have the fruit of that being really true. It is not judgment but discernment. Hopefully she will be like the woman caught in adultery (which essentially this is) who Jesus said "I don't condemn you, but go and sin no more". 

Remember you are in a spiritual war not a war against flesh. Also, get many prayer warriors on your team to pray for this young woman, the father and the baby. In all things, may God's will be done, but remember nothing is impossible for Him. I know a woman who had three abortions before surrendering her life to Christ. She repented deeply and was born again. She loves the Lord and His Word immensely now recognizing His great mercy for her.

Pray, pray, pray. God bless you!

August 18 2016 2 responses Vote Up Share Report

Mini heather York
In my humble opinion and as a family member of some one who was in this situation, unless I have been asked for advice from the person who is pregnant, or a family member (parent), I need to be quiet. I can offer my support and love by letting them know that if there's anything I can do to help, that I'm available. Love never fails.

August 18 2016 0 responses Vote Up Share Report

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