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My husband and I have been through tough times in our 3 years and 6 months of marriage. We’ve been trying to have a baby and I got frustrated and started to have lots of arguments out of frustration. He didn’t have a job and we pray for God to give him a job and he got it. However, ever since he started this job he turned away from God and stop going to church. He was unfaithful to me emotionally with a person that used to work in that job, nothing physically happen between him and the other woman and even though I wanted to leave he showed me he was ashamed and we went to therapy for a little bit.
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So the question is, 'What can you do to remain a faithful and loving wife.' The rest of your question, the part about your husband turning away from God and not going to church, has nothing to do with your behavior as a wife. You owe it to yourself to remain faithful to God. You are claiming here to be a person who acknowledges God. I assume by the way you stated that your husband no longer goes to worship services, that you still attend, but you attend alone. So it is your contention that when a person ceases to go to worship services, that person has turned away from God. It could be argued that your husband was never turned toward God in his heart. It could be argued that when he didn't have a job, he felt that he needed help from God. Needing help and asking God to help is very different from being a person who wants to be a friend of God. It also could be argued that your husband did have a yearning for God and still does, even though he doesn't attend church services with you. It could be that he's trying to ostracize you, I'm sorry to point out. I believe that is what you should try to determine. A relationship with God is personal. I can point out case after case where God applied to a person on a personal level and not to "a family." God initially spoke to Abraham while he was alone (Genesis 12:1). The same is true for Jacob (Gen 28); and Moses (Exodus 3). God spoke to Samuel one on one; he didn't speak to Samuel while Samuel was with Eli. God initially spoke to Samson's mother when her husband, Manoah wasn't with her. A relationship with God is shown in scripture to be between God and the person of his interest. In summary, God usually appeals to us on an individual basis, not as man and wife. For instance, God could have gone to the virgin Mary and her fiancé Joseph while they were together, but he didn't. If he had, wouldn't it have been easier for Mary to not have to explain her condition to Joseph? Why go to her one on one instead of both of them together? I'll tell you why; God desires a personal relationship with me, you, your husband, all of us. He wants the relationship to be fomented that way. What am I saying? I'm trying to show you and anyone who reads this that although our marriages are a picture of the relationship between God (Jesus) and the church, that ain't the whole of it. (don't be fooled by religious claptrap; we stand before God as individuals). Jesus made it clear that we MIGHT be required to split with family to be in relationship with him. "From now on in one house there will be five divided..." (Lk 12:52). I'm not trying to say that anyone should use what Jesus said in Luke 12 to split with their spouse. I'm trying to say IN CONTEXT what he was saying: that each person, regardless of their family structure, OWE IT TO THEMSELVES to appeal to God as an individual. God appeals to us as individuals and we are to appeal to him in the same way. If a family member starts out with Jesus and turns back, we are justified in continuing on with the Lord on our own. So how do we remain faithful to a spouse who might be oatracizing us, and is seemingly rejecting or turning away from Jesus? The first part of such a question is disputable. Some of us take the position that a wife is to show servile deference (kowtow) to her husband. That is enormous nonsense! (I won't spend any of my remaining characters on such a nonsensical view). It is enough that we remain faithful to God. How do we do that? We keep our vows to one another. How do we do that? "You shall love the Lord with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. On these two depend all the Law and the Prophets." (Matt 22: 37-40) Keep your vows. That's "faithful" enough! Is your faith in God weakened by your husband's actions? Pray for strength; for both of you, but stay focused on Jesus!
It's tough to see your husband turn away from God and stop coming to church, especially after all the challenges you've faced in your marriage. However, here are some things you can do to remain faithful and continue being a loving wife: 1. Pray for your husband: Pray for his spiritual awakening and for God to guide him back to His path. Ask for strength to handle the situation with love and grace. 2. Lead by example: Focus on deepening your own relationship with God and living out your faith in a positive way. Let your actions speak louder than words and inspire your husband to return to his faith. 3. Communicate openly and gently: Share your concerns and feelings with your husband, expressing your desire for both of you to find strength and support in your faith. Avoid blaming or criticizing him; instead, express your love and concern. 4. Seek professional help: Consider seeking guidance from a spiritual counselor or therapist who can help you both address the underlying issues and conflicts in your marriage. This can provide a safe space for open communication and healing. 5. Practice forgiveness and healing: By forgiving your husband for his emotional infidelity, you can both work towards rebuilding trust and finding a path forward. Remember that healing takes time and effort from both sides. 6. Surround yourself with a supportive community: Connect with friends, family, and fellow believers who can offer encouragement, prayer, and advice during this challenging time. Joining a small group or engaging in meaningful conversations with others who have faced similar situations can bring comfort and strength. 7. Keep nourishing your marriage: Continue to invest in your relationship by prioritizing quality time together, finding common interests, and strengthening your emotional connection. Emphasize the pillars of a healthy marriage, such as trust, respect, and open communication. Remember, your journey may not be easy, but with patience, love, and faith, you can navigate this difficult season and find ways to grow closer to God and each other.
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